Men are dying—but the real crisis is the death of true masculine values. In a world that increasingly feels unstable and dangerous, we overlook a silent truth: when men are stripped of purpose, denied space to protect and provide, and shamed for expressing strength, society loses one of its grounding forces.

This blog is a call to arms to men to reclaim their truth and for woman to support them — not with anger, but with clarity. We must give men a voice without judgement, without guilt, without shame—and crucially, without the need for validation or comparison. The time for measuring men against others is over. The time to let them stand fully in their own power has come.

The Silence Surrounding Men's Mental Health

In today's rapidly evolving society, the mental health challenges faced by men have become increasingly pronounced. Despite growing awareness, many men continue to suffer in silence, often feeling unsupported by systems that don't align with their intrinsic needs for purpose, protection, and connection. This disconnect not only exacerbates mental health issues but also underscores the necessity for societal structures that resonate with men's natural inclinations.

Societal expectations have long dictated that men embody strength and stoicism, discouraging the open expression of vulnerability. This has led to alarming statistics: approximately 40% of men have never spoken to anyone about their mental health, citing embarrassment (29%) and perceived stigma (20%) as major barriers (Priory Group, 2023). Such reluctance contributes to men being three times more likely to die by suicide than women in England (Mental Health UK, 2024).

Misaligned Support Systems

Traditional support mechanisms often fail to address the unique ways men process and express emotional distress. For instance, after experiencing an assault in 2016, I sought help and was funneled into a system that presumed the incident was the root cause of my distress. In reality, it was the broader sense of being misunderstood and the lack of purpose that weighed heavily on me. This highlights a critical gap: systems that don't consider men's distinct emotional and psychological needs can inadvertently alienate those they aim to support.

The Erosion of Purpose and Safe Spaces

Historically, men have derived a sense of purpose from roles that emphasise protection, provision, and love. However, shifts in societal structures have led to the decline of traditionally male-dominated industries, leaving many men feeling adrift and undervalued. The "Lost Boys" report by the Centre for Social Justice reveals that young women aged 16 to 24 now earn nearly 10% more than their male peers, underscoring the challenges young men face in finding their footing in today's economy (Centre for Social Justice, 2024).

Interestingly where many woman are now rising high in male dominated industries now, the wellbeing sector is one of the hardest places for men to have a masuline voice.

Personally I am not ashamed to say that in my own industry I feel very much an outlyer and have faced countless rejections because I dare to stand for something other than what the industry expects. But my own purpose is not about conforming, but breaking down barriers to empower men and woman to find their own unique truth and inner belief.

Furthermore, spaces where men once found camaraderie and an outlet for stress, such as gyms or true male-centric groups, have diminished. While initiatives like Men's Walking and Talking Groups and Men's Circles have emerged, some men like myself, feel these are female-oriented models imposed upon them. While they may offer value to certain individuals, they don't resonate with everyone. The absence of authentic safe havens means that many men lack environments where they can truly express themselves without fear of judgment.

Disengagement and the Rise of Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

In response to these societal shifts and the erosion of traditional roles, a significant number of men are disengaging from societal participation and turning to alternative coping mechanisms. Studies have shown that excessive consumption of pornography can lead to social isolation and dissatisfaction with real-life relationships. A 2017 analysis of 50 studies found that pornography use was negatively associated with sexual and relational satisfaction among men (Catholic News Agency, 2017). Additionally, the accessibility of online pornography has been linked to a decline in motivation and ambition, further contributing to disengagement from societal roles (The Boar, 2022).

Compounding this issue is the emergence of unrealistic dating standards, often encapsulated in the "6-6-6 rule," which refers to expectations that a man should be 6 feet tall, earn a six-figure salary, and have six-pack abs, thank you to my wife for making me aware of this one. Such standards can lead to feelings of inadequacy and discourage men from pursuing relationships. Discussions around this phenomenon suggest that these expectations are not only unrealistic but also detrimental to forming meaningful connections (New York Post, 2024). The alignment of this "666" standard with a number often associated with negativity underscores the darker implications of such societal pressures.

Alarming Trends in Men's Mental Health

The repercussions of these societal shifts are evident in the rising statistics related to men's mental health:

• Suicide Rates: In 2023, 6,069 suicides were registered in England and Wales, with males accounting for approximately 75% of these deaths. The male suicide rate was 17.4 deaths per 100,000, the highest since 1999 (Office for National Statistics, 2024).
  
  
• Social Isolation: A recent UK study found that nearly 26 million people reported feeling lonely at least occasionally, equating to nearly 50% of all adults (Research in Practice, 2024).
  
  
• Mental Health Disorders: Approximately 12.5% of men in England are known to have a mental health disorder (Mental Health UK, 2024).
  
  

These figures underscore the urgent need for interventions tailored to men's unique experiences and challenges. More over we need to question across all of society that if the present offerings 

If Suicide and Mens Mental Health was a Physical Disease

If suicide among men were treated as a physical illness, the national response would look drastically different. Take prostate cancer, the most common cancer among men in the UK and historically a leading cause of male death. In 2013, the prostate cancer death rate stood at 29.9 per 100,000; by 2020, it had dropped to 24.9 per 100,000—a reduction driven by early detection campaigns, funding for research, and targeted health interventions (Cancer Research UK, 2024).

Now contrast that with suicide. In 2020, the male suicide rate in England and Wales was 15.3 per 100,000. By 2023, it had surged to 17.4 per 100,000—the highest since 1999 (Office for National Statistics, 2024). Despite suicide now claiming nearly half as many male lives annually as prostate cancer, the disparity in prevention efforts, awareness, and public investment is glaring.

If male suicide had a physical symptom—a tumor or a blood test marker—would we still ignore it?

Would we still shame those suffering or expect them to "man up"?

Until we treat this crisis with the same seriousness as physical illness, men will continue to die in silence, not only physically but psychologically.

What's more solutions exist that work, so the question to ask is why is society ignoring it?

Beyond Gender Comparisons: A Call for Inclusive Support

Over the past few decades, we’ve witnessed the transformative power of empowering women—movements that helped millions rediscover their value, break free from limiting roles, and claim their space in the world. From campaigns about confidence and career equity to safety, self-worth, and expression, society has invested deeply—and rightly so—in helping women thrive.

But what about men? Especially the 90% of men who aren’t CEOs, influencers, or elite power players. For them, there’s been no equivalent movement. Instead, they’re often told to either toughen up or step aside. The world tells them they already have everything—yet many feel like they have no place. Stripped of roles that once gave them identity and dignity, and shamed for their natural traits, many men have lost touch with their true masculinity.

It’s time to change that—not just for men, but for everyone.

When men are supported in discovering their true masculinity—not the outdated version of dominance or suppression, but the grounded, purpose-driven traits of protection, provision, discipline, love, and emotional courage—something powerful happens. They stop performing. They start showing up. They build, they heal, they connect. They lead with heart, not ego.

When that happens, all genders thrive. Because masculinity in its healthy, grounded form doesn't oppress—it uplifts. It brings safety, stability, and strength to families, workplaces, and communities. It complements feminine power rather than competes with it. It creates harmony, not hierarchy.

Empowering men to rediscover who they really are is not about reclaiming the past. It’s about building a future where wholeness replaces performance—and where every person, regardless of gender, has the support to step into their full self. A world with emotionally healthy, purpose-driven men is not just safer—it’s stronger, more stable, and better for us all.

This discussion isn't about comparing genders or diminishing the strides made in female empowerment and opportunities for underrepresented groups. Instead, it's about ensuring that all men, regardless of socio-economic background, have access to choices and support systems that resonate with their needs, rather than being confined to options dictated by existing frameworks.

A Call for Purpose-Driven Support

Conclusion

In conclusion, as society progresses toward inclusivity and equality, we must ensure that support systems evolve in tandem. By acknowledging and addressing the unique challenges men face, we can cultivate a culture where both men and women thrive, leading to a more balanced and empathetic world.

My Mission is not just to help men, but for everyone in society to find their authentic truth, my question to you is this.

The support men and woman need beyond the mainstream narrative exisits. In 2018 when I was suidical, lost and abandond, I stepped into my true masuline to find a way for others to step into their authentic truth.

Who do you know who needs help today, not just to heal themselves, but healed people heal people, and one life change starts a ripple that changes the world.

Find out more at www.makeyourlifecount.co.uk